Monday, June 17, 2013
Pictures!
I realized I haven't put a lot of pictures of my family up, so I wanted to share some visuals. Enjoy!
Fathers Day
Yesterday was the first fathers day for my husband and he chose to spend it playing video games and relaxing. I preferred spending a day at the beach (mothers day), but to each his own.
I am thinking about parenthood today; about the ups and downs of raising a child who seems hell bent on ending his own life in a very painful way. This little boy of ours seems determined to injure himself or his parents; a couple of days ago, he bit me and today he learned to climb the stairs.
I was upstairs picking out some stuff to sell at a yard sale when I heard my husband shouting for me to come see. So I poked my head over the railing and saw my son, who was concentrating very hard, two steps up ans climbing. I panicked. I did not know whether to take a picture or scream! Eventually, baby boy scared himself and tried to throw himself down the stairs, but my husband caught him before any damage to person or property.
You know in Harry Potter when the people get stunned by "stupefy!"? Well, thats how I feel when I remember that I am the parent of a toddler. My eyes get big and my heart stops like I am having a heartattack. Not because I am sad or angry. I just can't believe it. I cant believe that a year ago(almost) I gave birth and now he is big enough to walk around the house, crawl up the stairs, get in the pantry, and generally making chaos. Just thinking about it makes my brain crash, like a computer.
I am thinking about parenthood today; about the ups and downs of raising a child who seems hell bent on ending his own life in a very painful way. This little boy of ours seems determined to injure himself or his parents; a couple of days ago, he bit me and today he learned to climb the stairs.
I was upstairs picking out some stuff to sell at a yard sale when I heard my husband shouting for me to come see. So I poked my head over the railing and saw my son, who was concentrating very hard, two steps up ans climbing. I panicked. I did not know whether to take a picture or scream! Eventually, baby boy scared himself and tried to throw himself down the stairs, but my husband caught him before any damage to person or property.
You know in Harry Potter when the people get stunned by "stupefy!"? Well, thats how I feel when I remember that I am the parent of a toddler. My eyes get big and my heart stops like I am having a heartattack. Not because I am sad or angry. I just can't believe it. I cant believe that a year ago(almost) I gave birth and now he is big enough to walk around the house, crawl up the stairs, get in the pantry, and generally making chaos. Just thinking about it makes my brain crash, like a computer.
Thursday, June 13, 2013
This blog is morphing or "Hilary vs. the SAHM idea"
I started this blog with the intention of getting information about the Marine Corp to the newly inducted members of this lifestyle. I had intentions of explaining the ins and outs of this life, since no one really knows what it is like until they are doing it.
What I failed to realize, is that the time between having kids (dealing with Tricare) and PCSing (dealing with the Marines) is actually pretty boring.
The only difference between our life and a civilians life, on average, is that he comes home and complains and PTing in the morning and what stupid crap they talking about at the shop.
That isn't to say that our lives aren't difficult and have a unique set of stresses that a civilian cant understand. My sister, for example, will never know what it is like to have to explain to her son why daddy isn't coming home for a few months. My son is only a year old, but he already knows when dad isn't here. He sits by the door and softly says "da-da-da-da". Don't call me over dramatic, because I know he doesn't grasp the situation, but I am 100% sure that he knows dad isn't here. I know a time is coming when our son asks me why his dad Inst at his birthday party or why dad wont hold him(he is in uniform, of course).
So I guess what I am trying to say is that, yes this life is hard, but it goes on. In a moment of clarity, I realized that after the initial enlistment, life begins to even out (until a deployment). Wake up, feed the son, feed the dog, watch Smallville, watch Dora, eat, nap, etc.
I feel like the only direction that this blog can take is to talk about how the Marines affect my marriage and son.
So on that note, today I am pissed because I asked my husband to help me pick up around the house. And he gave me a look. In his face I read "I work all day long and all you do is take care of the baby."
It isn't the first time we have had this unspoken conversation. Usually, I just say whatever and do it myself while he plays a video game. Because the hours from 5-10 pm are the only time he gets to relax. But what he doesn't understand is that, while I a may not have a job, I work every freaking hour of the day and night. He comes home and relaxes for a couple of hours, but I am always on baby/house duty. Diapers, feedings, dinner, laundry, cleaning, cleaning the exact same thing again, dog, bills! The list goes on.
To be fair, he does occasionally help me, but only if I ask first. I cant think of a single instance where he decided to come help me, independently.
Here goes a conversation;
"Honey, can you unload the dishwasher?"
He gets up from the couch, his face looking like I just asked him to build the ark.
"Yeah, I guess" he sullenly replies, as he pauses his game.
10 minutes later...He only unloaded the dishwasher, when there is a huge pile of dishes in the sink from dinner. Yes, I only said to 'unload' but it is my opinion that loading it again is a logical decision after unloading it.
I have had that conversation a dozen times in the last couple of months.
Yes, he works. Yes, he is tired. We both are. That doesn't make it okay.
New policy, if he wants dinner or to have his charlies ironed, he better make it worth my time. I have enough to do with his son (okay, OUR son). I wasn't the only one who made that kid. If my day doesn't end at 5 o'clock, neither does him.
In other news, I made a fuss with the units FRO about one of her volunteers(called 'snotty sergeants wife') who was hostile and elitist in one of our interactions. So I talked the the family readiness officer and she says she will talk to SSW about her attitude and professionalism. Yeah right, like talking to a *itchy girl about her attitude every made a difference. I just hope to God that the FRO doesn't mention my name. That's all we need; to have a pissed wife talking crap about my husband and I to her NCO hubby. Awesome...
What I failed to realize, is that the time between having kids (dealing with Tricare) and PCSing (dealing with the Marines) is actually pretty boring.
The only difference between our life and a civilians life, on average, is that he comes home and complains and PTing in the morning and what stupid crap they talking about at the shop.
That isn't to say that our lives aren't difficult and have a unique set of stresses that a civilian cant understand. My sister, for example, will never know what it is like to have to explain to her son why daddy isn't coming home for a few months. My son is only a year old, but he already knows when dad isn't here. He sits by the door and softly says "da-da-da-da". Don't call me over dramatic, because I know he doesn't grasp the situation, but I am 100% sure that he knows dad isn't here. I know a time is coming when our son asks me why his dad Inst at his birthday party or why dad wont hold him(he is in uniform, of course).
So I guess what I am trying to say is that, yes this life is hard, but it goes on. In a moment of clarity, I realized that after the initial enlistment, life begins to even out (until a deployment). Wake up, feed the son, feed the dog, watch Smallville, watch Dora, eat, nap, etc.
I feel like the only direction that this blog can take is to talk about how the Marines affect my marriage and son.
So on that note, today I am pissed because I asked my husband to help me pick up around the house. And he gave me a look. In his face I read "I work all day long and all you do is take care of the baby."
It isn't the first time we have had this unspoken conversation. Usually, I just say whatever and do it myself while he plays a video game. Because the hours from 5-10 pm are the only time he gets to relax. But what he doesn't understand is that, while I a may not have a job, I work every freaking hour of the day and night. He comes home and relaxes for a couple of hours, but I am always on baby/house duty. Diapers, feedings, dinner, laundry, cleaning, cleaning the exact same thing again, dog, bills! The list goes on.
To be fair, he does occasionally help me, but only if I ask first. I cant think of a single instance where he decided to come help me, independently.
Here goes a conversation;
"Honey, can you unload the dishwasher?"
He gets up from the couch, his face looking like I just asked him to build the ark.
"Yeah, I guess" he sullenly replies, as he pauses his game.
10 minutes later...He only unloaded the dishwasher, when there is a huge pile of dishes in the sink from dinner. Yes, I only said to 'unload' but it is my opinion that loading it again is a logical decision after unloading it.
I have had that conversation a dozen times in the last couple of months.
Yes, he works. Yes, he is tired. We both are. That doesn't make it okay.
New policy, if he wants dinner or to have his charlies ironed, he better make it worth my time. I have enough to do with his son (okay, OUR son). I wasn't the only one who made that kid. If my day doesn't end at 5 o'clock, neither does him.
In other news, I made a fuss with the units FRO about one of her volunteers(called 'snotty sergeants wife') who was hostile and elitist in one of our interactions. So I talked the the family readiness officer and she says she will talk to SSW about her attitude and professionalism. Yeah right, like talking to a *itchy girl about her attitude every made a difference. I just hope to God that the FRO doesn't mention my name. That's all we need; to have a pissed wife talking crap about my husband and I to her NCO hubby. Awesome...
Friday, April 12, 2013
Southern (dis)Comfort
When I pictured living in the south, I imagined genteel ladies drinking ice tea on a white porch in beautiful summer dresses while the kids tried to catch fireflies in the yard. The sort of stereotypes you accept watching movies.
What I didn't expect was humidty so unbearable that I felt like I was melting. The last four days here at Camp Lejeune have been some of the hottest and stickiest of my entire life. The temperature has been in the upper 70's, but its the humidity that makes it feel like its in the 90's. I went into my backyard yesterday, to do some weeding. After 5 minutes, I had huge drops of sweat running down my face and blurring my vision. Even the dog was just laying, panting.
I was not prepared for this, at all.
Being from a place where it snows seven months out of the year, I am not adjusting very well. My hair feels like a greasy mess, my skin in oily, and I am out of deoderant.
I cant wait until my husband gets home so that we can go to the beach! Maybe it will be cooler there.
What I didn't expect was humidty so unbearable that I felt like I was melting. The last four days here at Camp Lejeune have been some of the hottest and stickiest of my entire life. The temperature has been in the upper 70's, but its the humidity that makes it feel like its in the 90's. I went into my backyard yesterday, to do some weeding. After 5 minutes, I had huge drops of sweat running down my face and blurring my vision. Even the dog was just laying, panting.
I was not prepared for this, at all.
Being from a place where it snows seven months out of the year, I am not adjusting very well. My hair feels like a greasy mess, my skin in oily, and I am out of deoderant.
I cant wait until my husband gets home so that we can go to the beach! Maybe it will be cooler there.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Yardsale Season!
Im super excited to have the yardsale season start! Such great opportunities to find little household items or to find a huge selection of baby clothes that have only been used a few times. Last time I went searching, I found sheets for my sons crib, a beautiful silver serving spoon, and a teddy bear that plays a heartbeat.
That doesnt even cover what I have found online. I have bought a recliner for $70, a dresser for $50, and a coffee table for $35. I also bought a huge trashbag of baby clothes for $50. All of these are in great condition and were exactly what I wanted! AND, all of that was just in the last two months.
I found that the key to finding a good deal is to never settle. Say that you are meandering on craigslist and stumble upon a great looking end table. It EXACTLY matches your decor and you are so excited...until you see the asking price. "$50, firm!" Darn it! Thats way to much for a single end table! But its perfect. Dont give into temptation! For a used table that has probably had a kid gnawing on it, that price is ridiculous, unless its some fabulous antique. So here is what I suggest you do;
Here are some tips to decide if an item is worth your time:
My favorite sites for yardselling:
I cant wait for the season to get started! I am hoping to find a toddler bed, so that when the little boy transitions, I can seamlessly switch out the crib.
Let me know if you know of any other good sites to shop!
That doesnt even cover what I have found online. I have bought a recliner for $70, a dresser for $50, and a coffee table for $35. I also bought a huge trashbag of baby clothes for $50. All of these are in great condition and were exactly what I wanted! AND, all of that was just in the last two months.
I found that the key to finding a good deal is to never settle. Say that you are meandering on craigslist and stumble upon a great looking end table. It EXACTLY matches your decor and you are so excited...until you see the asking price. "$50, firm!" Darn it! Thats way to much for a single end table! But its perfect. Dont give into temptation! For a used table that has probably had a kid gnawing on it, that price is ridiculous, unless its some fabulous antique. So here is what I suggest you do;
- Email/call the seller.
- Offer a price a little below what you want to pay for it.
- They will probably say that they have someone willing to pay the asking price. This might be true, but chances are that they are trying to get you to pay more than you are willing to.
- If they refuse to haggle with you, offer to pay the full amount, BUT they have to deliver the item (this is only if you feel ok with someone coming to your house)
Here are some tips to decide if an item is worth your time:
- Is it damaged? If its more than a scratch in the varnish or missing a button, its probably not worth your time and money. Unless your a handy person, that cabinet with the half sanded drawers will never be finished. Chances are that its going to just be an project you never decide to do.
- Is it assembled? Lets be honest, if your at a yardsale and someone is selling an bookcase thats been taken apart to be moved, that thing is not going to have ALL of the screws or the instruction booklet. After you shove that thing in your car, its gonna take you 6 hours to assemble at home. Is is really worth it?
- Who made it? A bag of walmart clothes is not going to last very long. Unless you have an 8 month old (me!) who is going to grow out of the clothes in a week, certain brands of clothes are not worth the time. Now, if you see a coach purse for $75, GRAB IT! I have yet to find this deal, but I have heard of them. Make sure its real though. I hear that you can tell if a purse is real by looking at its stitching and stuff.
- This is the most important: Make sure its safe. You probably have kids. and we all know that kids like to lick and chew and suck. Make sure that your not purchasing anything that has lead, mercury, or asbestos.
My favorite sites for yardselling:
- http://www.bookoo.com/
- www.craigslist.com
- FACEBOOK! They have buy/sell/trade pages for most areas. Just search near your location, and voila!
- Dont forget to look at local pawn shops, especially in a military area. When people PCS, they dont want to haul ALL of their stuff. Chances are that they will pawn their uneeded furniture and household items. You can also find gently used uniform pieces!
I cant wait for the season to get started! I am hoping to find a toddler bed, so that when the little boy transitions, I can seamlessly switch out the crib.
Let me know if you know of any other good sites to shop!
Saturday, March 30, 2013
The Glorious Return
Hello everyone!
I hope I didnt lose all my readers with my extremely long absence. I want to provide some highlights of the last few months;
However, for my glorious return to blogging, I would like to describe Jacksonville/ Camp Lejeune to all my readers, especially the ones who are on their way here.
Camp lejeune and the city of jacksonville are smashed right up against eachother. Terrawa Terrace (base housing) is literally across from the main street in jacksonville. Jacksonville is basically one long street as far as I can tell. Western Blvd houses all your big box stores, as well as the mall, the theatre, and every fast food joint you can imagine.
On the road into the base, called Lejeune Blvd, are a billion pawn shops. And the lovely icing on the cake is the strip bar called "Driftwood". If it wouldnt get me thrown in jail, I would burn that place down. Its the first thing you see when your leaving base and going into town. Its awful.
Anyways, Camp lejeune itself is pretty decent. The commissary and MCX are centrally located, especially if you live on base. However, if you live in Terrawa Terrace or Midway park, you have about a 10-15 minute drive to get there. TT and Midway are "base housing" but arent technically connected. You have to leave the housing area and go through the main base gate to get "on base". The neighborhood here at Midway Park is very quiet. People seem to keep to themselves a lot though. There are some nice ammenities though. We have a few dog parks, lots of playgrounds, a convenience store, and a chapel. Plus, its not huge like TT. Its sort of the suburbs of Camp Lejeune.
Housing here seems to be decent. I havent been inside TT's houses, but they look nice from the outside. Midway Park housing is all really new. My house has only had one person in it before me and was built in 2011. It is a bummer to have to go through the main gate traffic to get on base though. I have only been in the housing area for officers once, but I actually wasnt impressed. The homes looked rather old and worn.
Anyways, I have to go. The little boy (8 months old now!) is waking up and he is going to want a bottle.
Next time, I hope to share the Buy/ Sell/ Trade business her at Lejeune. Its sure to be fascinating for all you deal hunters.If your not sure its for you, let me amaze you with some of my finds!
I hope I didnt lose all my readers with my extremely long absence. I want to provide some highlights of the last few months;
- I moved to Camp Lejeune, NC
- Two weeks after moving here, I got pancreatitis and gall stones. Was in the hospital for a week
- Had to send Grayson BACK to WA with my family while I was in surgery,then recovering.
- Flew back to WA to retrieve my son
- Came back, got a dog named Carly
- Husband is now gone again to Yuma, AZ for 5 weeks.
However, for my glorious return to blogging, I would like to describe Jacksonville/ Camp Lejeune to all my readers, especially the ones who are on their way here.
Camp lejeune and the city of jacksonville are smashed right up against eachother. Terrawa Terrace (base housing) is literally across from the main street in jacksonville. Jacksonville is basically one long street as far as I can tell. Western Blvd houses all your big box stores, as well as the mall, the theatre, and every fast food joint you can imagine.
On the road into the base, called Lejeune Blvd, are a billion pawn shops. And the lovely icing on the cake is the strip bar called "Driftwood". If it wouldnt get me thrown in jail, I would burn that place down. Its the first thing you see when your leaving base and going into town. Its awful.
Anyways, Camp lejeune itself is pretty decent. The commissary and MCX are centrally located, especially if you live on base. However, if you live in Terrawa Terrace or Midway park, you have about a 10-15 minute drive to get there. TT and Midway are "base housing" but arent technically connected. You have to leave the housing area and go through the main base gate to get "on base". The neighborhood here at Midway Park is very quiet. People seem to keep to themselves a lot though. There are some nice ammenities though. We have a few dog parks, lots of playgrounds, a convenience store, and a chapel. Plus, its not huge like TT. Its sort of the suburbs of Camp Lejeune.
Housing here seems to be decent. I havent been inside TT's houses, but they look nice from the outside. Midway Park housing is all really new. My house has only had one person in it before me and was built in 2011. It is a bummer to have to go through the main gate traffic to get on base though. I have only been in the housing area for officers once, but I actually wasnt impressed. The homes looked rather old and worn.
Anyways, I have to go. The little boy (8 months old now!) is waking up and he is going to want a bottle.
Next time, I hope to share the Buy/ Sell/ Trade business her at Lejeune. Its sure to be fascinating for all you deal hunters.If your not sure its for you, let me amaze you with some of my finds!
Sunday, December 16, 2012
PCSing Update
Well, I am officially exhausted of this PCSing bull. I have done everything that I can, but unfortunatly, the rest depends on my husband...who isnt exactly the most reliable guy I know. My husband is an incredible and intelligent man, but his skills do not include getting things done.
I have been nagging him for two weeks about two things:
1) Get the loan started/finished with Navy Federal. He isnt going to be getting to work everyday if he doesnt have a vehicle.
2) Contact the Traffic Managment Office and figure out what the hell he needs to do so that we we can get reimbursed for all of the expenses that are involved with moving cross country.
3) Get our Power of Attorney to the housing office at Lejeune so that they dont scrap our entire
So far, all he has accomplished is getting the power of attorney and submited the loan application. My brain is about to explode from stress. And the biggest thing he seems to be worrying about getting packed for graduating on friday. blerg...
Anyways, I have accomplished quite a bit, and I dont mind patting my own back a little. I have managed to PRE-secure us a house ON-BASE, I have rented the truck, packed my entire house, bought flights, and made calls to the Jacksonville area, trying to find a vehicle that someone will hold till my husband gets there. I feel pretty good about myself!
I have been nagging him for two weeks about two things:
1) Get the loan started/finished with Navy Federal. He isnt going to be getting to work everyday if he doesnt have a vehicle.
2) Contact the Traffic Managment Office and figure out what the hell he needs to do so that we we can get reimbursed for all of the expenses that are involved with moving cross country.
3) Get our Power of Attorney to the housing office at Lejeune so that they dont scrap our entire
So far, all he has accomplished is getting the power of attorney and submited the loan application. My brain is about to explode from stress. And the biggest thing he seems to be worrying about getting packed for graduating on friday. blerg...
Anyways, I have accomplished quite a bit, and I dont mind patting my own back a little. I have managed to PRE-secure us a house ON-BASE, I have rented the truck, packed my entire house, bought flights, and made calls to the Jacksonville area, trying to find a vehicle that someone will hold till my husband gets there. I feel pretty good about myself!
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Jealous
As you can see, if you have investigated this page, I love to read other military spouse blogs. It makes me feel like I'm not completely alone in this lifestyle. Anyways, I noticed today that SO many of the wives have pictures of their weddings. Totally beautiful. But it made me contemplate a difference between me and most other marine wives; I married a man who became a marine. Most marines are 18ish when they enlist and usually aren't married. My husbands class only has one other married guy. Therefore, the majority of wives MUST have gotten married after their husbands were already marines.
Then BAM, I realized I was jealous that I didn't get to have the military style wedding; the one with my husband in his dress blues. I didn't really have a wedding, by choice, but I am crazy jealous.
I guess that my advantage is that my husband will never have to worry about having married a woman who only wanted the military life and the prestige. (Not that I am accusing anyone. I just assume that's an issue somwhere.) I married my husband when all he had to his name was a ford taurus and an x-box. I doubt that I fall into the golddigger catagory.
Also, I got to know the man, not the marine who had been shaped by bootcamp and combat. I fell in love with a (mostly) gentle soul. I wonder if most wives know the man behind the uniform? I guess that depends on if the military really does change you. I am on the fence since I don't know 100% if my husband is the same person now. I haven't really seen him in about nine months. His boot leave and my visit to CA don't count since they were such short periods of time.
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Enlisted VS Officer
I was googling away today and decided to see if the enlisted wives club at Lejeune had a website(see if I could start making some friends).
But all I could find was the officer wives club. And I started thinking...
I understand that officers and enlisted men shouldn't socialize. Just common sense. But why are they segregating the WIVES. We aren't the ones in the military; no rank on my shirt. So why am I made to feel inferior to an officers wife? That doesn't seem right!
I'm new to this lifestyle so I cringe at the thought of making waves, but I can't keep my mouth shut. I don't care if your HUSBAND is a general, well I do since that's wonderful for him, but I am not a second class citizen because my husband is junior enlisted!
I'm really glad I don't have a huge following right now. If an officers wife at lejeune is reading this, I'm probably setting myself up for failure...gah.
In other news, I'm trying to get my scattered posessions boxed up and ready for when my husband gets the moving part of PCSing figured out. I still have so much to do. I need a binder to organize everything. Hmm...food for thought!
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